So where have I been??? Ha I can't even tell you the level of insanity that has occurred since we moved in August then again right before Christmas. If you need a one through ten kind of guess then try fifteen! I have missed blogging though. It is my outlet, but my kids come first and so I walk away. I believe as a parent you need to set down the computer tablet and focus on parenting. I used to do martial arts and the grandmaster was discussing how to focus on just one task. If you are watering your plants then you are not trying to talk on the phone at the same time. Live in the moment was the lesson for the day. I know we don't do this enough. My tiny overlords keep me so busy that I don't do this enough. I'm just trying to survive so the house doesn't go up in flames.
The next time you sit in your car at a stoplight, pay attention to the people around you. You will notice they are not focused at all on the road. It is rather scary since you will see how distracted as individuals we have become. Is parenting the reason behind our lack of focus? Toddler needs this and the baby wants to be held and to manage it all takes skill which I'm afraid I don't always have. Hubby wants attention too, but I'm so touched out especially since I nurse the baby that I would just rather hide in a closet. Honestly, that is my focus and sadly I look to find opportunities to just be alone.
I know if I sit in the car for an extra five minutes while the kids are asleep that I might get a few more precious moments right then for some me time, but at the same time sacrificing later in the day. If my toddler gets a nap late in the afternoon, it is an absolute fight for me to get her to go to bed at a decent time. She is in that transition of not having a nap at all and when she does take a nap it is pure heaven for me. I get to focus on spending quality time with the baby or having a moment to cook lunch without a toddler being underfoot.
So what do you focus on as a parent? Do you know right away what is sacred to you? Its funny to me all the things I used to enjoy five years ago, is pretty much irrelevant to my life now. I used to enjoy retail therapy and now if I have a clean shirt right before I walk out the door, I'm doing a good job for the day. My direction has changed and that's okay. I just have to live with the guilt as I look at my poor dead plant to know its my children who keep me from watering it. Yes, I admit I'm a plant killer...
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